Dealing with infidelity often means tolerating a great deal of destructive, to the point of abusive, behavior.
The “letting go” – the healing, creating inner confidence and centeredness process often takes time.
And, as a person gathers his/her her resources and sorts out the crazy behavior with the hope of making an informed decision, yes, one does tolerate much s/he would not tolerate in other situations.
Read what readers say they tolerate in the midst of affair discovery:
He is living with her. He comes home to clean the driveway. He showers here. He talks to me when he wants but not when I want. He ignores me.
phone sms-ing, coming home late, leaving on weekends for a couple of hours to be with her, chatting on the internet.
Acting out husband who has on three occasions threatened suicide-once even bringing his (unloaded ) shotgun into the kitchen and threatening to end his life because I wouldn’t tell him I loved him after he had hugged and told me he loved me. Mood swings. Incredible neediness.He’s almost going overboard to try and please me. Too much touching,feeling,hugging ,holding hands behaviour-to the point that friends are noticing and remarking. Great difficulty talking about his affairs and giving me details.He claims affairs were 30+years ago ,so I should just forget and move on.I’ve obtained many of the details by calling on old friends and asking questions-eventually collecting enough data to confront my husband with.I still do not know the whole truth.
No closeness or sex. Lies about contacting other person. Depression No help with house chores Distance with kids