An affair dramatically alters one’s world. Thoughts, feelings, expectations and the issue of trust become paramount.
Read what some describe as the changes the affair has made in their life:
1. Preoccupation with comparing myself with others.
2. Spend time watching a computer tracking system looking for activities 3. Insecurity of being myself.
4. Fear of not doing what activities spouse wants to do worrying about what he’ll get into with my presence.
5. My husband had an affair with a woman who lives out of state, so much of their communication was via email and phone. Although he assures me that he has not heard from her since June, I still catch myself wondering about things when his cell phone rings or when he spends too much time on the computer.
6. Since the affair, I now feel that I am somehow in competition with “her” and with other women in general. I am sure most of it is in my head, but I hate feeling this way.
7. Because my husband told so many lies during the affair, I find myself constantly wondering if he is telling the truth now. Although I have no reason to think he is lying now, I guess once bitten twice shy. I really didn’t think I had anything to worry about back then either!
8. Since the affair, I have noticed one positive thing. Because I did spend 6 months on my own in an apartment, I know that I am more than capable of providing for myself and my two-year-old son. I no longer have that “dependency” on my husband that I felt just prior to our break-up.