Confronting the Other Women: Drama X 3

Don’t need this juice in my life… read this Case Study:

1. What was your purpose for confronting the OP and what did you say/do?

My purpose was to tell all 3….that I found out about their affairs with my husband, and to let them know what I think of them…sluts. And never to contact him again, or they will have to deal with me.

2. What happened? What was the outcome?

One just walked away from me angry, and has avoided me and my husband every since whenever we unfortunately would run into her, and on one occasion, she spit on the ground after my husband walked by…I was behind him walking and saw it. The second one we had a decent 2 hour phone conversation, but she tried contacting him again on his cell phone, as she is one of his clients, and said she was inquiring about some work being done at her house, and said she wasn’t getting any answers from his staff, so went directly to him. I sent her an email, reminding her that we (my husband and I) had sent her a text message from his phone saying never to contact him again, to deal with his staff instead…in my email I also said if she still has a problem with the staff, to either go above my husband to the owner, and I gave her his cell phone number, or, contact me and I will make sure her work gets done, and gave her my cell number, and I also told her if she is still not satisfied, then I suggest she find herself another company to do her work, there are plenty of them out there hungry for the work. With the third one, I showed up at a bar that she and my husband were at, I had found out, and told her to get out, and never contact my husband again. Both of them were very angry at me, too bad. Tough nuggies and all of that. She turned on her heel and left. She called the next day to talk to my husband again on his cell phone, about the previous night confrontation, so I called her back that night when I found out about her phone call from my husband….I called on his cell phone so that she would pick up, and I spelled out specifically that she is to never contact him again, that he has been trying to get rid of her (he told me this himself), and am I making myself perfectly clear, or do I have to go to her house or work (I knew where both were), and tell her in person? She said nothing, and hung up. Never heard from them again since. Also, on the third one, my husband said he was actually glad I showed up at the bar because that ended it…he had “no idea” how to end it with her, and I did the trick. I am sick of this. I feel like his mother. I have my own boyfriends now, that he is too stupid to stumble upon, as I was too smart to stumble upon his 3, maybe their are or have been more, though, I don’t know…yet, anyway.

3. If you were to do it again, would you do it differently? What did you learn?

I wouldn’t do it again because I did it 3 times, 3 times too many…I am not putting up with any more of his affairs again…if I find out, I don’t care anymore…I have my own “friends” now…I would just keep it to myself…or divorce him…but, he has alot of money, so, why? I have a great life otherwise, with our children too, don’t have to worry about money thank God and live in a beautiful house in a beautiful area…and am a very good looking woman, so, now, I don’t turn down any advances anymore…it ain’t too bad! I’ve lost all love for him after finding out about these affairs, so, what does it matter anymore…who cares.

Comments

  1. Hi,

    I too have a letter that I want to send the other woman but to date I have not got the nerve. I think that it is over but everyday I wake up anxious thinking that he is going to go out and see her. The letter tells her that he is with me and all she has is memories and that she is no longer fabulous a word she used to describe herself and my husband was calling her that too. Some days I think, so what, if he talks to her by email so what but I fear he will start to see her again. I just cannot seem to trust anything he says or does and I am a nervous person all the time–I waste so much time and energy on trying to be a step ahead of him so I will not be made a fool of again. He tells me that he does not see or talk to her anymore but I do not really belive that he does not e-mail her. I think that this is constant but I no longer have proof. I think that if I tell her and threaten to tell her husband if she so much as calls to say hi–i may feel better. I fear, however, how this will fly with my husband. He may get so mad at me that all the work we have done together would go by the wayside. God I wish I did not care so much, in fact I actually pray to fall out of love with my husband because then things would be easier.

  2. I suspect my husband is cheating with a co-worker but I did not catch him yet, he says he wants our marriage to work but I feel that he wants the other woman and still remain married. I don’t trust him I have mileage logs and hotels that he has searched online and these places are only a few miles from his work.My strong gut feeling does not want to let go of the mistrust I do love him so much it hurts.We agreed to counceling but I don’t know what’s going to happen.He has lied in the past making stories on being late from work without an explanation of extra miles and sometimes he will try and say that he tried a new route home and got lost.

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