Infidelity is not an easy thing to have to go through for anybody. You become so consumed with pain and hurt and betrayal that you start to feel like it will never get better. But it will.

Over the past two decades that clients have come in to talk about their infidelity crises, there is a common theme that occurs for those who finally let go of their pain and resentment, and move forward – that is, when they finally get an answer to that one question they’ve been asking themselves over and over again.

This question is the key to surviving an affair and eventually moving past it with relief and joy. Most of the time, you’re probable not even aware that you are asking it, or maybe you don’t even know what it is. This question isn’t necessarily the same for everyone. We all have different experiences and our situations are not the same, but there is always that one thing that we dwell on, whether consciously or not, and we just want to know.

It may take some time for you to realize what it is, probably around three to eighteen months, but when you do, it will feel like a fog has lifted and you will be able to take the next step in your life with confidence and certainty.