Different kinds of affairs mean different approaches in handling the situation, which in turn will produce different results. In some relationships, a partner having an affair may be one of the greatest things that had happened for the marriage. For most though, it means the end. Affairs demand different things, from patience and understanding to tough love and action. It just all depends on what kind of affair it is.
People usually react differently when they hear of their partner’s affair, but the emotional impact is equally strong for everyone. Expect to have plenty of sleepless nights, and feel kind of a numbness that will leave you idle and unproductive for weeks. It usually takes a long time for an individual to work through everything and process things completely – usually about two to four years. Having a good therapist or counselor may help you deal with it faster, but it usually depends on your situation.
The reason why the emotional impact of a situation like this runs deep is usually because of two major things: the trust you had in your partner is completely destroyed, and the consequences of keeping secrets in a relationship takes its toll on you.
One of the most important things you will have to develop is to trust yourself, and not to put your trust completely in your partner. You should also learn to deal with the ramifications of what this does to your relationship.